Mixed Feelings

After writing a post about TV that is completely lacking in any and all substance, I felt like I needed to at least acknowledge that I do know what happened yesterday. In fact, I was watching Alias when my roommate walked in the living room and told Cora and me the news. We paused the show and took the news in for a minute, then we pressed play. I didn't turn on the news. And the truth is, I didn't want to. I don't want to know the details. It's good enough to know that bin Laden is gone.

In a lot of ways, my emotions are mixed right now, but not because I think bin Laden's death is a bad thing. I just don't like celebrating the death of a human being. I'm not putting anyone down; everyone else can celebrate however they want. This is a good thing. I just don't feel like celebrating.

I've watched plenty of TV shows and movies where the bad guy has finally been killed and thought, "It's about dang time!" But this is real life. This isn't a fictional character on a screen. This was a real man whose life is now over. Don't get me wrong—bin Laden was an evil, evil man who needed to be stopped, and if this is the way it had to happen, so be it. I just have a hard time being happy and shouting for joy when I hear about loss of life.

You are never going to hear me say that bin Laden's death is a sad thing. Never in a million years. He was a terrible person who did terrible things, and knowing that he will never be able to do any of those things again makes yesterday a victorious day for the United States, and for the world in general. Those who serve this country are incredibly brave, loyal souls who ensure that I can live the way I do, and I will ever be grateful for that.

That is why I would say that I am satisfied that bin Laden is gone, that that threat to peace is now eliminated. But I will not cheer in the streets. It is sad that bin Laden lived his life in a way that made this the necessary end to it. I am satisfied in knowing that he is now facing his just reward and will be fully aware of all the sins he committed as he faces eternal judgment. Satisfied is a good word for how I feel. Satisfied, but not particularly happy.

With that said, I really like this photo.

Give up the world, give up your life, cuz you cannot fight the television!

I have to stop getting addicted to TV shows! Especially when they're old shows that are already completed so I can spend as much time as I want watching episode after episode. After episode.

The current culprit is Alias. I never watched it when it aired, and when I started working at KLAS, I started hearing about it. Two years later, Karly, Angie, and Jenifer have successfully convinced me to start watching it, which was made easier when Karly handed me all five seasons. (Yes, five. Yes, that is definitely a bad thing.)

I started watching mostly out of curiosity, and I wasn't super sucked in. I watched a couple of episodes here and there, and it was entertaining enough that I kept watching, but I wasn't dying to know what happened next. Until Will Tippin got more involved, and then I was hooked, because Will was pretty much my favorite character. Because he's a stud, and Bradley Cooper is hot. (Nerdy hot, no less. How they managed that is beyond me.)

And then I finished season one and moved on to season two, and I was a goner. Irina Derevko working with the CIA? Double Francie? Will knows all about Sydney? Sark everywhere? Sloane being more manipulative than ever? Vaughn and Sydney (finally)? And then, of course, there was the whole Hong Kong ending and that damn ring on Vaughn's finger. (Don't even get me started on Lauren. Ugh. And no, that paragraph isn't supposed to make sense. Unless you've seen Alias. Then you'll completely understand.) Season two basically did it for me, and now I'm stuck.

Here's yet one other reason I keep watching:

*drool*

To quote Karly, Michael Vartan could be my handler any day.

And is it weird that I kind of really like Sark? I know he's a terrible awful person (especially with that whole Lauren fling, yuck), but he's kind of endearing. As much as I like him, I'm waiting to see when he'll finally get shot in the face. I don't know how he's avoided it so far.

And then there's always the comedic relief. Weiss is freaking awesome. "This is why people at the CIA and NSC don't get married. You don't poop where you sleep." I love him.

Remember that time I wondered how long I could last without an obsession? Well, now I know. It's about a month.

Questions of Style

I love shoes. I have a lot of them. Not an exorbitant amount, mind you, but a lot. I could probably go over a month without wearing the same pair of shoes twice. No, not probably. I could. Which is why it's not so much of a surprise when I forget about shoes that I own.

I was getting dressed before work this morning when I remembered something. I own a pair of saddle shoes. So on the fly, I put them on.

All day long I have vacillated between thinking I look awesome and thinking I look ridiculous. I still can't decide.

Defiantly ≠ Definitely

According to Merriam-Webster.com:

de·fi·ant: full of or showing defiance : bold, impudent <defiant rebels> < a defiant refusal>

def·i·nite: 1: having distinct or certain limits <definite standards for pupils to meet> 2a : free of all ambiguity, uncertainty, or obscurity <demanded a definite answer> b : unquestionable, decided <the quarterback was a definite hero today>

Therefore, "OMG, I am so defiantly there!" has a much different meaning than "OMG, I am so definitely there!" Mmmkay?

*end rant*

Short (really short) Fiction

Look at me, doing another writing exercise so soon. I wonder how long this will last.

Battery

A man walks down the street, phone in hand. He walks five steps, then checks his phone. He walks seven steps, then checks his phone. He walks fifteen steps, the phrase "do not check the phone" on repeat in his head, before he can't take it anymore and checks the small, shining screen. His hopes and dreams lie in that seemingly innocuous device. One beep, one bar of that catchy song, could determine his future.

He continues walking, his wrist flicking and head tilting like some kind of twitchy dance, a dance that everyone around him knows and understands and mocks anyway. Look at that, they say. That piece of plastic and metal is like an extra appendage. I bet he couldn't put it down if you paid him. These people ignore the irony of their own bits of plastic and metal residing in purses and jeans pockets, accessible in a second if necessary.

The man continues his walk, heart pounding and hands sweating. He checks the phone once again, then transfers it to the other hnad. He walks. Tells himself he won't check the phone again. But he does.

The phone buzzes in his hand. That catchy tune starts up and the man's heart pounds nearly out of his chest. He fumbles the phone, finally managing to hit the correct button. He puts the phone to his ear, calls out a hello, when the battery dies.

An Attempt at Being Creative

I used to be a creative writer. I used to have notebooks full of my stories. I would take those notebooks and a contingent of pens with me wherever I went. I wanted to write a novel. Then I got into high school, and I got busy. Busier than I had ever been. I got into choir and drama and suddenly writing wasn't as important anymore. Then I went to college and the only time I wrote anything creatively was when it was required for a class.

But I want to change that. I want to write again. I've wanted to for a long time, but I just haven't gotten around to it. In all honesty, I'm not sure how much time I'll actually devote to it this time around, but I want to give it a shot. So I'm going to start doing some writing exercises, and I welcome any and all criticism.

I got this prompt from oneword.com, which gives one word (hence the name) and gives 60 seconds to just write whatever comes to mind. So here goes.

Bookshelf

It was bowing. I could see it—pulled down by the weight of the words, the pages, the binding. Books on top of books shoved behind books, a maze of ideas and concepts. New people and familiar places. Worlds I entered as a guest and exited as a true friend. This was my life, chronicled and complied and organized by author name. Some sections are frayed, the stitches pulling apart from the strain of opening and closing time after time. Other sections are pristine, lacking dents and folds and scrapes. Lacking character. Lacking love. Yet they sit there still—taking up precious shelf space simply by virtue of their being books. Books. That's what it's all about. My kaleidescope of interests staring me in the face day in and day out. I hold entire universes on those shelves. Universes that make up my own universe. My own world. My own home.

Music Break 2011

I wrote this post about a year and a half ago that I stumbled upon recently, and I figure that enough time has elapsed for me to do another one. I think it's kind of fun to see what music I'm really enjoying at the moment. So, in no particular order, here are twenty of my current most favorite songs.

1. "Gravity" by Sara Bareilles, Little Voice (This song is AMAZING. I have to train my voice so I can hit the ridiculously awesome note at the end of the bridge. It gives me chills.)
2. "Black Sheep" by Metric, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (I wrote about this song here, and there's a video. Go listen.)
3. "Neverland - Piano Variation in Blue" by Jan A.P. Kaczmarek, Finding Neverland (This soundtrack is beautiful. Gorgeous. Lovely. Incredible. My heart simply responds to it, and I don't have an adequate adjective in my vocabulary to describe it.)
4. "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon, Only by the Night
5. "Rocketeer" by Far East Movement ft. Ryan Tedder, Free Wired (Ryan Tedder's voice is simply awesome. I love him.)
6. "Say (All I Need)" by OneRepublic, Dreaming Out Loud (Again, Ryan Tedder. Love love love.)
7. "Come Home" by OneRepublic and Sara Bareilles (Ryan Tedder + Sara Bareilles = Magic. I can play this one on the piano, and I seriously need to find a man who can sing it with me, because the duet is brilliant.)
8. "Coalwood" by Mark Isham, October Sky (This is another song that simply speaks to me. I've loved it since I first watched the movie when I was probably 11 or 12.)
9. "Falling Slowly" by the Swell Season, Once (This whole soundtrack is fantastic, as is the movie.)
10. "Forget You" by Cee Lo Green, The Lady Killer (This is a good sing-at-the-top-of-your-lungs song.)
11. "Grenade" by Bruno Mars, Doowops & Hooligans (It's a little morbid, but I love it so.)
12. "Airplanes" by B.o.B, B.o.B Presents: The Adventures of Bobby Ray (I'm not the biggest rap fan, but I seriously love this album. It's great stuff.)
13. "Mad" by Ne-Yo, The Year of the Gentleman
14. "Animal" by Neon Trees, Habits (You gotta love the bands with ties to Provo.)
15. "You Already Know" by Train, Save Me San Fransisco (The whole album is phenomenal, but this was the song that really jumped out at me.)
16. "This Too Shall Pass" by Ok Go, Of the Blue Colour of the Sky (Awesome song by an awesome band that's even awesomer live.)
17. "Poker Face" by Lea Michele and Idina Menzel, Glee (This duet is fantastic. I love singing to it.)
18. "Already Gone" by Kelly Clarkson, All I Ever Wanted (This song was written by Ryan Tedder. Need I say more?)
19. "Tribute" by Tenacious D, Tenacious D (While I would never recommend this entire album [way too many f-words], this song is simply hilarious, and I love it.)
20. "Everyday" by Buddy Holly (What would this list be without a classic of some kind?)

Now I must ask everyone to glance over this list and realize that there is not one mention of either Sherwood or the Beatles. Amazing, no? That doesn't lessen my love for either of those bands, but I thought it was something worth noting.