Don't Waste the Pretty

So, as girly as it may seem, I just finished reading the book He's Just Not That Into You by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo. And it was freaking amazing. I'm sure to a lot of people (guys especially) this seems like a bitter, I-hate-men kind of book to read. But it's definitely not.

Disclaimer: However much I may gush about what I read in this book, this doesn't mean that I think everyone should read it, that it's drastically changed my life forever, that I'll never be discouraged or upset about my love life ever again. It just helped me realize some things that I hadn't thought about before, and I think it will help me keep some things in mind in the future.

I think what I liked best about this book is that Greg (who writes most of it) says over and over how he believes every woman deserves the best in a man. He believes that every woman is amazing and wonderful and brilliant and they just need to go out and find the men that agree. And the first step to finding a man who will treat you well and love you for who you are is believing that you deserve more than a crappy, half-relationship that is detrimental to your mental health. And I agree. It makes me think of a line from a Barenaked Ladies song: "You'll never love another till you love yourself." That idea just rings true to me. If I don't love myself, how could I expect anyone else to love me?

I don't have a lot of relationship experience under my belt, but the experience that I do have sucks. I know that my relationship sucked. But it took me four years to figure that out. And the hardest part about reading this book is that it pointed out to me over and over and over again just how much that relationship sucked, much worse than I realized. Each chapter is dedicated to a specific sign that a guy is just not into a girl. There are eleven chapters. I could specifically identify with seven of them. Seven! And with only one guy. Boy, I sure know how to pick them.

There were some awesome quotes in this book. One of them is the title of my post. Life is short. Don't waste the pretty on guys who don't deserve it. Another of my favorites was, "You are an excellent, foxy human being worthy of love, and the only way you can pursue that idea is by honoring yourself. At the very least this means ridding your world of dudes who are not worthy and setting a standard of excellence in your daily life." How true that is! And not only when it comes to dating. I think this applies to everything in our lives. Replace "unworthy dudes" with anything else detrimental and it works just as well.

Here are a couple others I loved:

"I believe in love the verb, not the noun. I believe in letting the woman I love know I love her all the time with my actions."--Now this is the kind of guy I want.

"Have faith. What other choice is there?"--If we don't believe we'll find someone, we won't. It's that simple.

"Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out and they're working it out on your time and with your heart."--So, so, so true. This one definitely hit home.

Bottom line is, I am an amazing, wonderful, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves the very best in everything. Including guys. And now I have to go out and find one who agrees with me and treats me accordingly.