Open Your Eyes!

There's been a lot of talk in my apartment lately about how the guys we know just don't seem to know how to go after the right girls. This obviously isn't the case all the time, because there are plenty of happily married couples out there who got together because the man pursued the woman. But I think there are often times when guys just look over the girls who would be good for them and look right to the girls who aren't.

I've seen this quite a lot with people I know lately. And it's not even that the guys are going after bad girls, they're just going after the ones who aren't interested. Which basically means that they're the wrong girls. I can think of quite a few examples off the top of my head of boys who go after girls who aren't interested when there is another girl, right in front of him, who is good relationship material. And I'm not necessarily talking about myself here. I have some freaking amazing roommates and friends, and if these guys would just open their eyes and see them, they would find some amazing girlfriends. When it comes to some of these situations, I just want to grab the guy, shake him, and yell, "Can't you see what you're missing? Look at her! She's amazing! And she'd gladly date you if you asked! What is so hard about making a move?!" But alas, that rarely works.

Sometimes I wonder if these guys are afraid to start a relationship with one of these amazing women because they're afraid that she'll be the one they want to keep. Because commitment is scary. I was told today by a guy friend that I am "marriage material." I'm apparently not the kind of girl guys would want to date frivolously. I'm not the fling. I'm the commitment. If that's the case, no wonder guys are fleeing from me. I'm scary. I'm emotionally distant and I'm the commitment. Now that is a recipe for relationship disaster.

But back to my original point. Guys need to stop going after the girls who aren't interested and open their eyes to the girls who might be interested. There are some amazing women out there who won't mess with guys and who won't lead them on. And in my experience, those women are often right in front of your eyes. So, to the guys: Keep your eyes (and your mind) open to the possibility that the women you associate with might just be good for more than simple association. I just read that love is not found like gold in the ground. It is constructed like stainless steel formed by fire and chemistry. And sometimes that fire and chemistry is there with someone that you never expected, until suddenly you realize it's been there all along and you just had to open your eyes and see it.